Wednesday, 30 January 2019

DIARY: A Special Concert That Changed My Day

Today I had an amazing experience. After running drums and choir at Peninsula Village in Umina. I was asked to sing for the elderly folk in the frail care unit at Jack Aldous house by Jason Martin.

I didn't have anything prepared but had some old classical recordings from 2014 that I could sing along too and harmonise with.

There were about 11 or 12 folks waiting around the long table for their lunch, I set up my new Speaker (!) and sang a selection of songs for them: Ave Maria, Ave Verum, Laschia Chio Pianga and O Sole Mio. The acoustics in the room were like being in a cathedral... Beautiful!

I smiled to myself while I walked to my car, because the whole morning I had been feeling insecure and a little bit down. Not sure if I was really adding value to my choristers lives and feeling a little sad and self consciousness. I had tried lightening the mood with funny stories, and hearing my choir giggle made me feel better. My choir sang beautifully too 💕

After I finished singing at Jack Aldous House, the elderly folk were just so sweet and so encouraging, asking when I'd be back. It was like being blessed, I had a lightness of step and easier smile... My heart lifted ♥

POETRY: In Memory of Aiia Maasarwe and Eurydice Dixon

https://youtu.be/ldKK7VJI8fk
"In Memory of Aiia Maasarwe and Eurydice Dixon"

Just a little something inspired by a conversation with Ash Tobin about the recent international discussion about the Murder of Aiia Maasarwe.

Sometimes in the garden,
Sometimes in the snow,
Sometimes in the wood, 
Where the brambles grow.

Sometimes under bushes,
Sometimes on the sand,
Sometimes after romance, 
After holding hands.

Sometimes when sunlight, 
Is dancing though her hair,
Sometimes late at night, too, 
and it isn't fair.

Sometimes it's a friend,
Sometimes it's their dad,
Sometimes it's a stranger,
... Understand?

Sometimes it's planned,
Sometimes it's not,
Who will be next, and, 
How can we stop, it? 

You see, rape and murder 
Doesn't only happen late at night. 
We have to work together 
to find a plan that's just right.

Lifting up those who are broken, 
Those who we see, 
Who are falling down, 
Before they reach, 
That place. 

Raising up boys, and men, 
Girls and women of strength, 
Being neighbours, Being connected. 
Speaking up when we see injustice. 
Stop Rape. 
Stop Murder. 

#stoprape
#stopmurder
#aiiamaasarwe
#eurydicedixon
#JaneDoe
#JohnDoe

Sunday, 27 January 2019

DIARY: The Purpose of Life

Written in 2015. Found today for Charlie-Belle... 💗 You've got this, girl.

-----

So today I had a breakthrough.

So often in my lifetime of seeing wasted lives and wasted gifts (my creative, musical and talented Dad) and people crushed by the decisions that they have made. I have asked myself for as long as I can remember: What is our purpose. Why do we wake up every day, sleep every night, make dinner after breakfast after lunch repeat repeat... Why do we raise our children generation after generation through time, why do we grieve only for our loved ones to be forgotten with the passing of time... and today it hit me between the eyes.

We do it for the moments. The 'MOMENTS' - you know them? When you are talking to your children and suddenly notice how beautiful the colour of their eyes is... you see those tiny flecks and spots of colour and amazing detail... when you see the sun setting and you have to stop and really take it in. When you sink into your bed at night. When you meet an elderly stranger over in the veggie aisle and they say kind words, drop a word of wisdom into your lap - leaving you wondering.

Life is about the million moments that we can either notice and appreciate, or gloss over and lose... For me I asked myself, why do I do it? Why do I sing, practice, spend money on sound etc Why do I make things? paint, sew? why? It's all meaningless really. But, when I had my realisation, I can have so many 'moments' during each creative process, celebrate each new step achieved, each new little creation, each new song. I can seek out the moments within each new client or audience, make friends, laugh - connect. It isn't about the destination, it's about the journey. We can be broke, we can be flush, we can be sick and tired and broken inside - but we can make the choice to seek out the moments.

I cried in the car outside a store in West Gosford, I made the choice today, to take each moment. Draw the essence out of each moment. Will you join me?

Saturday, 26 January 2019

DIARY: Australia Day and a Certain Facebook Post

Terrigal below the Skillion, credit: Rhys Pope 

It's interesting to note, I posted a status in support of the Aboriginal people of Australia on Facebook this week.

The jpeg text with aboriginal flag, and the hashtag #invasionday, mentioned asking white people to not apologise for past wrongs, but to please step in to dismantle any systems of oppression that still exist today.

It means identifying them, and making effort to make changes that bring about equality, in your industry, in your town, in your neighbourhood, in your schools. Being a whistle-blower and supporter of the minority in Australia. End of story. They are the minority. And yes, they are very special and precious people.

I am only 4 years into my journey of understanding. And I will spend the rest of my life sitting around fires, dinner tables... Listening and learning and supporting as best I can in my industry and my everyday life. Speaking out when I see injustice.

It's interesting to note that the only comments were from 3 white cisgendered males. One was genuinely asking "how can I do this thing you speak of?"
The other two were negative. Missing the point of the post completely. Not recognising the flag, nor the meaning of the hashtag. (what are the chances that they've read of Captain Cook, of the multiple horrific massacres of Aboriginals, or the proposed heritage ship set to circumnavigate Australia? (instead of funding dementia studies perhaps?) Do they know of Flinders? Or his cat? Or of Bungaree who was the first Aboriginal man to circumnavigate Australia as Flinders' aide - but isn't mentioned, or honoured with statues even though Flinders' cat is...) They were demanding and asking for exhaustive lists "of these so called systems of oppression" from me, and "evidence of how you are helping to dismantle these systems"...

White males. Why?

One was Australian. He asked how he could do what I asked. He teetered along the edge of appropriate. The other was from South Africa with zero experience in the Aboriginal struggle. Someone who has literally lived his life benefiting from his skin tone. And the other was American and also in no way involved, but demanding that he be recognised as having NOT benefited from his race.

White males. Why?

I don't care if my opinion offends people. I stand with Aboriginal people, always will. I always stand with the underdog. My father and mother and grandmother showed me that I could love and respect people of colour even while apartheid was raging around us. They all did things that put them in the red zone. They were kind and fair, and an example to me of how to treat those who are the minority, or who are less fortunate, or who are oppressed.

I lived through apartheid. I saw it with my own eyes. I loved people that I was not "allowed" to love. I was separated from friends, and even a possible boyfriend because he was not white, I had a mother who breastfed me but was *not* my mother, and when she died I was not invited to her funeral because I was the interloper...

I also have lived the other side of the coin. Being the minority. Being disrespected and disliked by the majority in my home country. I know how it feels to seem insignificant. I know what it is like to walk through the streets in town and have people intimidate and threaten you, to feel so unsafe (I can't speak for all of my fellow white South Africans, only from my own personal experiences)

White males. Why?

It's not too much to ask. IF you see and recognise a system of oppression in your town, in your school, in your neighbourhood, do something about it. Promote inclusion, promote understanding, promote sensitivity, promote unity, promote fairness. IF you do NOT see and recognise a system of oppression in your town, in your school, in your neighbourhood, then ask yourself why. Open your eyes.