Friday, 24 August 2007

Good monkey, good monkey…


It was a Monday, 13 August 2008, I left work and went to Crompton hospital to give blood for preggy tests… I drove home in a rush, I had to pick up my pooch Oscar and take him to have stitches removed and then I had to rush off to Glenwood to fetch my husband from work. Now, at the best of times I feel shaky after blood tests and so as I arrived home I stepped from the car and noticed that there were an unusual amount of monkeys running around. As I walked nearer to our entrance (we’re the third and end house) I started to shout at the Juvies that were jumping around in front of me – I really hoped that there were no more of them near our place (my one phobia is : monkeys)
AS I turned the corner I realised with horror that there were about 20 of these monkeys right outsode my door! The alpha male was sitting on my step eating a piece of corn, the huge females were sitting next to him and they all just eyed me out.

I had no choice but to get into my house so I adopted the quieter approach (I was sure that my previous yelling would not hold much sway with Big John and his Bi-yatches.
It think it went something like this…
“Gooooood monkeys, gooooood monkeys” and a step closer,
“aaaaaaaalright gooooood monkeys” and I slowly move the open rubbish bin away from the front door.
“Oookaaay monkeys” and I open the gate – praying that they don’t crowd into my home and wreck the place.

I got inside and burst into tears. It had taken so long to get into my home that I now couldn’t take the dog for his stitches and I would be late fetching my husband!!

I stood inside crying until I got so mad I just freaked out – I got my whistle, my dog, my hand bag and my keys and burst through the back door like Jackie Chan blowing the whistle and freaking out. I kicked everything that I could see to the side, the rubbish bin, the packets, vegetables, cans, bottles, you name it - it got kicked. Our back yard looked like a trash dump!

I ended up being on time fetching my husband…a little shaken but ok.

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